Goodbye Constant

Looking back at things bring up a lot of feelings. There are feelings of miss, funny, hatred, hurt, loss and mostly love. I have no idea what's got into me but I am feeling so nostalgic atm. On top of that, I guess some things from the past found its way into the present, bringing up unresolved feelings and false hope, yet again. But looking at old pictures, and old posts tells me of how much I have changed. Judging myself from last year, I have to say, I'm satisfied. I like myself. I like the people I have around me.

I know we're not as close now, because I went away, and I realize it's mostly my fault for not talking to you guys when I have the chance. Seeing how left out I am in your lives just show how selfish I am, but I don't know, I guess that's one thing I can't change. We still have chemistry, I still love you like family. But some things turn out the way it does because it's just meant to be like that.

And you, who after much thinking, is I guess the only constant in my life is probably no longer gonna be that. You're leaving and I have to say, it's probably perfect timing since I've made things awkward between us (though it's you who is awkward, I'm just fine bro~). I'm sorry for thinking too much and feeling too much but I guess that's just who I am. I doubt you'll ever read this but oh well. To me, you are that one person who knows more about me than anybody else. You bring out the worst in me but you bring out the real me as well and I thank you for helping me reach this stage of finding myself.

I'd hate to say it, but I guess this is goodbye? Or early goodbye. Please don't remember me as the crazy girl desperate for love (or you) haha, because I'm not in love with you, you don't have to worry about that. Or maybe I am, but that's a mystery I have to dig deeper to uncover. For what it's worth, you were real too.