Secrets shouldn't be kept. Secrets are meant to be told to each member of the clique if you have one. They're meant to be spread around. They're meant to be said aloud. What is it of a secret that's so private that no one could know? It's your personal life, it's in your body and soul, what's there not to share? It's just that; it's nothing big. So what if everyone knows. As if it's going to ruin your life, because you're so ashamed of what it was.
Because if it was going to ruin your life, trusted people would have not teased. Which is why they are trusted. They are where one tells his/her secrets to. And your role as trusted people, you should not say anything about it out loud. You would have definitely not tell people. You would not "play around" teasing that person if it was a sensitive issue. But wait. Is it a sensitive issue? Is it so important? Your secrets. Things like those aren't going to ruin a person's life, is it? 'Cause if it was, you'd be dead by now. Am I right? I don't know, you make the decision.
Or is it that person's fault? The one with the secrets. It's her fault that she told? It's her fault that she trusted her so-called trusted friends with her secrets? If you ask me, I don't think anyone would tell their secrets, or admit it (if people found out) to the people who they don't think are worthy enough to tell. To the people who they think are in their right minds, to the people who actually think through what that secret means to them. But who am I to say that? Maybe all you other people agree that secrets are to be told to everyone. What's the point of having them anyway?
I know secrets. Maybe not a lot. But I know a couple or so. And I could have easily told the whole world that this girl likes that guy in her class. I could have said, "Mm, I know. Oh I know you like him, you can't hide things from me." I could have gone to her ex-boyfriend and "make it all better" by telling him all the things she's keeping inside. I could straight away go to this guy and ask why he doesn't like this girl, what was wrong with her. I could have done all those. I would have if secrets are meant to be told. I would have done that if I wasn't thinking of that person. Trust me, I would. If she or he is not so important to me, why should I keep her/his secrets? It'll just occupy my memory space.
Look, I'm not saying I'm good. I'm not saying I'm trustworthy because I keep some secrets. I am certainly not saying I'm the only one who's in her right mind, who thinks about others. No, no. I'm just telling all of you out there who are reading this to protect your friends' secrets. No matter how much it itches your tongue to just say it out loud, keep it. Ignore it. Even if it's not a secret, it's something personal that they only feel comfortable to tell they're close and trusted friends, do not ever tell anyone else. What's so hard anyway?
If my crush is standing 10 feet away from where I stand, you could just giggle and show that the-love-of-your-life-is-here smile. You could just make a lame excuse to go, "I'm being pulled by an imaginary rope, I must go and leave you behind," and then spy from an angle you could see. And then you could have all the details. I would give it to you.
Listen, I really like this guy. I like how he can make me smile and laugh at even the silliest things. I like how he's always there when I'm heading somewhere and stops to chat with me for a little while. I like how he knows so much, how helpful he is. And most of all, I like how he makes me feel. Sure, he may not like me. We may not ever end up together (and I don't mean boyfriend and girlfriend). But that's not, definitely not a reason to tell everyone about it. It doesn't ruin my life, I don't live for him, astaghfirullah. It's the disappointment from the people I trust that hurts. It's the embarrassment of facing him any day soon that sucks. Well, what if he thinks I'm this weird kid who is madly in love with him and avoids me? Say he's a cool guy, say he won't think that, say he wouldn't avoid me, but does that really stop the embarrassment that's inside of me? And how'd you know anyway?
You wanna know the reason I didn't tell you about him? Why I hid it? I knew I liked him. I had a thought about it quite some time before. But I didn't tell. Because, I don't trust you. I'm being honest here. I'm sorry if it's harsh, if it hurts your feelings, if we can never be friends again 'cause I said that, but that's the truth. I knew you would somehow manage to get it to him. I'm not talking about a specific person here, all of you who thinks I'm your close friend. I've learned this. I've been with you since 2 years ago. It doesn't take one person so long to get it through her head that this person and this person are not to be trusted. Count how many times I or anyone else have told you secrets, and count how many times you've let it "slip". If you've read this, okay, backbite me all you want, say stuff like how I'm so overreacting, how I'm this and that. Do it. I don't care, but oh my God, it's just something that you have to learn.
Yes, I've done it too. I've told your secrets to the people you're hiding them from. I've teased, I've made fun of you/them(thesecrets), I've tried "helping". And you know what "helping" leads to? Embarrassment, sadness, depression. "Helping" isn't really helping. It makes things worse, get that through your head. Okay, I don't know laa, you wanna do it, do it. Three of you, I've lost my trust in. Even if you're my best friends, I don't trust you. I won't talk about who I like, I won't tell what's going on with my life until I trust you again. But don't, please don't continue to do it. From now on, you'd find me to be the most boring person alive.
Maybe I'm wrong, fine. Maybe I shouldn't like him. Or any other guy in this whole universe. It just leads to this, to me blaming you if there are any awkwardness between me and the guy. If I'm wrong, I'm sorry. 'Cause when you think back, like from the beginning, it all starts from me, so technically, I'm to blame here. Okay, I accept. I'm wrong and you are not at fault for teasing. It's how it is. It's over anyway. There's nothing you or anyone could do about it. If guilt is suddenly in your heart, and you want to make it all better, don't. Take my word, don't!
"Do not tell secrets to those whose faith and silence you have not already tested." - Elizabeth I
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