If Only Words Were Said At The Right Time

"If I didn't say what I said that night, would anything have changed?" Tammy asked her best friend, Carter as she laid on the grass next to him, looking at the stars. He was the first person that came to her mind after her break up with her boyfriend, Sam. She came to him with teary eyes and he offered her a hug and said nothing else; he knew. There was always something about him, it was as if they could feel each other.

They talked as the evening sun turned to dusk and dusk turned to night. They had went to their hiding spot, where nobody else knew but them. A year before when they'd met, it was right there, coincidentally. They started hanging out and as their friendship bloomed, feelings started to kick in. They'd spend every moment they could there, talking as if time wasn't an issue and the world was not in their dictionary. Tammy found out that Carter was a lot like her. But their relationship didn't last long, it was only about a month when she woke up on day feeling nothing.

As they talked about her failed relationship, he comforted her, telling her she's special to him, in a way. Carter's always had this charm in him, where he could make Tammy smile with just simple words. He could flash her that smile that always gave her heart a little squeeze. But she knew she had no actual feelings for him; Carter was no more than a best friend and he had a girlfriend. There was no way Tammy would ever go in between their relationship.

After the sun had set and the sky's turned dark blue, they laid down on the grass, talking about them. About them, about what happened. It started when Carter told her, "guys are jerks." And she'd agreed, saying, "you were a jerk too, you know. Last year, I was still in love with you when you talked to me about Brenda. It was as if she was some kind of an extraordinary girl whom you've never met before and I was just there, listening to my heart breaking."

Carter sat up, looking at Tammy. "What? Wait, you never told me this. Why'd you say you were over me that night when I asked you what you were confused about?" he asked, his face puzzled.

Tammy got up as well, looking right into his eyes and thought for a second before replying, "because I was confused! I didn't know what to say. We weren't talking much at that time, and then there was that event in school, one which you didn't say a word to me!" Silence. And they laid back down, stargazing. "If I didn't say what I said that night, would anything have changed?"

"I don't know, maybe. We might still be together."

"No, no, no. You're with Brenda now, and you love her with all your heart, the universe has told you who you're meant to be with. And besides, weren't you already crushing on Brenda at that time? You and her were in the same sleepover at that dude's house mid-year last year, and you accidentally touched her hand and felt that zap of electricity. Right?'

"Yeah, but I just liked her. I could have stopped anytime. When you said you were over me, I was thinking of what I did wrong.. I thought you had fully given up on me, so I was like, okay. Brenda it is then. I felt like there was no point in liking you anymore," Carter said, his voice so full of feelings.

"Well, it's over now. You and Brenda will live together forever and ever."

And right there, Tammy thought, is this real? Or is he just saying this for fun? Does he still think about it? If he does, then does that mean we might have a chance together? Her heart made a leap and brought her back to reality.

You and Me - Lifehouse

H.R.