Okay, I got bored of studying so I went to Lisa's blog to see if she had post something new. Then, I remembered the conversation of my cousin and I about some mutual friends and the fight. Since I had nothing to do, I scrolled down Lisa's blog and I finally found the post.
As I read the first paragraph, my stomach twisted, felt agony in my heart. I stopped. I can't bear to read another sentence. It's too hard. Now, I'm sitting in front of this laptop, eating an Oreo, cursing myself for ever going to her blog. I can't concentrate anymore. It's weird how one's writing can leave another wondering for hours.
What should I do? Should I call her? Can't I just let this go? Is it so hard? I mean, I have other friends, why do I need to think about this for so long? It's not like she cares or anything, right? Wait, she doesn't. Right? What if she does? Would I know? Why am I so freaked out about it? Can't I just pick up the phone and dial her number? It's an easy thing to do. What if she doesn't pick up? I wonder if she still thinks about this. Did she really forgive me? Or did she not? Is that why she doesn't reply my Hi's and Bye's?
Reading back all her posts just makes me sad. Did I really do that? How can I be so stupid? All of these months, she has helped me and all and I repay her with this? :(
No comments:
Post a Comment