Okay, just cut it! CUT THE CRAP ALREADY! What the heck is wrong with you people and talking like that? I mean, I know you don't like us upstairs "Kampung People", but SERIOUSLY?! DO YOU HAVE TO BE LIKE THAT?! A few months ago, YOU were the ones who told me that I can't be like that. AND NOW YOU ARE?! Who the hell ARE you people to say that I can't do this and that, but YOU do it? You say what I did hurt your feelings, but what about what YOU do now? Doesn't it hurt any of the people who really talk like that?
I know, I know. Why should I be the one saying all this? It's not like I'm any one of them, BUT SERIOUSLY ! COME ON LA ! Anybody can speak for anybody! You wanna ask me why I'm the one offended, well, it's cause you describe me as one of them, so, I guess I am one of them, and yeah, I guess you could guess why now, huh? It doesn't matter who you are, in the lowest or the highest position, you have NO RIGHT to tease people! Especially not in public places such as facebook! You can do it among yourselves where people who get hurt can't see you. At least you'd get backstabbed less. You can do it at school, but where people you want to tease can't see you. But on facebook? That's just low. Even for you guys.
If you wanna say that maybe you just started talking like that? Yeah right. First, you criticize all the people who talk like that, now you're doing it? As if. Puh-lease! PEOPLE ARE WAY SMARTER THAN THAT ! You can't just say that you're the only smart ones and all that, and that people who actually talk like that won't know if it was a tease or you're really talking like that.
No, I am not saying that you can't tease those people. For all I know, we tease you whenever you walk past by. You can tease them. Who am I to say you can't tease them? It's just that, you CAN'T TEASE THEM IN PUBLIC PLACES WHERE THEY CAN SEE YOU ! Try it if you were in there position! Your cheeks would burn in embarrassment, wouldn't they? You would feel embarrassed to talk like that, since people are teasing you with it. Come on, think la. You guys are better talking like 5-year old kids, even if they are annoying, than hurting people.
You know, you wanna say that I'm just the same, well, that's not really true. Because you know what? At least I know I'm hurting you. Do you know that you're hurting them? I know what I do is wrong, even if it's just for fun. Do you? I know when I should stop. Do you? Defend yourselves all you want. You just can't take back what you did and how many people you've hurt.
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Writing
On the 19th of November, the New South Wales candidates got their certificates, including me. I was sort of happy to get it, but then, when I looked at what I got, I was crushed. I failed. In English and Writing! I mean, English is like, my favorite subject and writing is my favorite part of English. And I failed.
Okay, my writing wasn't THAT bad. I did get credit. But it was just credit! I want more. I mean, it's writing. I love writing. It's like talking to myself. Okay, maybe I don't like and am not so good at writing things according to their themes. Maybe I like to write whatever is on my mind. But so what? There was not theme in that essay. I could have written about anything. I just have to include a few things that are necessary. So, it was actually easy. I wrote about a masquerade ball, where this rich man needed to get home to his sick son, but he lost his car keys and couldn't find it. I got stuck there. I guess that was what made the score equals to (only) credit. *sigh* I got the same score as Ashvin. Curse him -.-''.
My English was REALLY BAD! I got participation. (LOL) Participation? Really? I have to admit, it's kind of really funny now. It was kind of sad to find out about it in the first place, but now, who cares? They're MY marks. What should I be ashamed of? It's not like they are anybody's to matter, right? So, yeah, whatever. The paper was hard anyway. I couldn't have possibly passed. I'm not so smart anyway. So, what do you expect? When life gives you disappointment, just laugh it off. It's way better than stressing and being sad about it.
Haziq told me that Lisa got High Distinction for writing. I admit. I was a little bit jealous. But as I said, they are way smarter than me and they know really complicated words which I've never heard of. And so what? I'm just thirteen. There will be plenty of time for me to practice my writing. Being good at something doesn't mean that you're all that. It's not being good at something that makes you all that. Whatever that is. 'Cause you get to live the moments of not being good at something. I know. Sounds complicated and like it doesn't make sense. But if it can make sense in my head, I'm sure it can in yours. Seriously, think about it. What fun would it be if you are already good at something? You don't have to live the not-good part.
Writer Cyril Conolly quote, "It's better to write for yourself and have no public than to write for the public and have no self". And it's true. What good would it be if you write for someone else and not yourself? Write for your pleasure, not others.
Okay, my writing wasn't THAT bad. I did get credit. But it was just credit! I want more. I mean, it's writing. I love writing. It's like talking to myself. Okay, maybe I don't like and am not so good at writing things according to their themes. Maybe I like to write whatever is on my mind. But so what? There was not theme in that essay. I could have written about anything. I just have to include a few things that are necessary. So, it was actually easy. I wrote about a masquerade ball, where this rich man needed to get home to his sick son, but he lost his car keys and couldn't find it. I got stuck there. I guess that was what made the score equals to (only) credit. *sigh* I got the same score as Ashvin. Curse him -.-''.
My English was REALLY BAD! I got participation. (LOL) Participation? Really? I have to admit, it's kind of really funny now. It was kind of sad to find out about it in the first place, but now, who cares? They're MY marks. What should I be ashamed of? It's not like they are anybody's to matter, right? So, yeah, whatever. The paper was hard anyway. I couldn't have possibly passed. I'm not so smart anyway. So, what do you expect? When life gives you disappointment, just laugh it off. It's way better than stressing and being sad about it.
Haziq told me that Lisa got High Distinction for writing. I admit. I was a little bit jealous. But as I said, they are way smarter than me and they know really complicated words which I've never heard of. And so what? I'm just thirteen. There will be plenty of time for me to practice my writing. Being good at something doesn't mean that you're all that. It's not being good at something that makes you all that. Whatever that is. 'Cause you get to live the moments of not being good at something. I know. Sounds complicated and like it doesn't make sense. But if it can make sense in my head, I'm sure it can in yours. Seriously, think about it. What fun would it be if you are already good at something? You don't have to live the not-good part.
Writer Cyril Conolly quote, "It's better to write for yourself and have no public than to write for the public and have no self". And it's true. What good would it be if you write for someone else and not yourself? Write for your pleasure, not others.
Cousins
DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW BORING FAMILY REUNIONS ARE WITHOUT COUSINS TO HANG OUT WITH?! I'll tell you how boring it is. IT'S REALLY REALLY A HUNDRED TIMES BORING ! Sometimes, when you stay at a relative's house, without a cousin you can really relate to, it feels like you've been there for a million years when it had only been a few minutes.
Cousins are an important part of our lives. Well, except if your parents' are an only child, then you'd probably won't have cousins. But anyway, when you do have cousins, and when you are really close to them, if you miss the one week of not seeing them, you'd feel like some part of you is missing, since you always visit them every week. Or the other way around. Well, I do. Maybe not all your cousins. Just the ones you are really close to. I get that some people are loners and when their cousins come 'round, they don't even bother to greet their cousins. But, I'm telling you, you're missing a BIG part of your lives. Because cousins are amazing.
The other day, on Raya Haji, I went to visit my "long-lost" cousins. Okay, maybe they are NOT so "long-lost". I just don't see them often. It's been about three years or so since our last visit. So, as you can guess, we're not really close. They're old anyway. That was the time, I realized that I really really miss my cousins that are in Australia. It felt like the family reunion wasn't completed. And it was SO BORING ! You cannot imagine how much I missed them and how bored I was at the moment!
So, now I know that cousins are an important part of my life/our lives. On every 24th of July, we should celebrate cousins' day. Or if you don't celebrate it (not that I do), you should at least be thankful that you have a cousin or cousins that you can relate to.
Cousins are an important part of our lives. Well, except if your parents' are an only child, then you'd probably won't have cousins. But anyway, when you do have cousins, and when you are really close to them, if you miss the one week of not seeing them, you'd feel like some part of you is missing, since you always visit them every week. Or the other way around. Well, I do. Maybe not all your cousins. Just the ones you are really close to. I get that some people are loners and when their cousins come 'round, they don't even bother to greet their cousins. But, I'm telling you, you're missing a BIG part of your lives. Because cousins are amazing.
The other day, on Raya Haji, I went to visit my "long-lost" cousins. Okay, maybe they are NOT so "long-lost". I just don't see them often. It's been about three years or so since our last visit. So, as you can guess, we're not really close. They're old anyway. That was the time, I realized that I really really miss my cousins that are in Australia. It felt like the family reunion wasn't completed. And it was SO BORING ! You cannot imagine how much I missed them and how bored I was at the moment!
So, now I know that cousins are an important part of my life/our lives. On every 24th of July, we should celebrate cousins' day. Or if you don't celebrate it (not that I do), you should at least be thankful that you have a cousin or cousins that you can relate to.
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Love
Love. What is love? How do you explain love? From what I heard, love is about letting go. Sacrificing what you have for your loved ones. But think again. Do we have to sacrifice what we have for our loved ones? Let's say he wants to kiss you. In public. Would you want to do that? As Muslims, we can't do that. So, it will be like taking your dignity away. Embarrassment. Guilt. Won't you feel that way if you were in that position? So, is that what love means?
Love is unconditional. To love someone, you must love them unconditionally. Or it's not love. Loving somebody unconditionally means that you love them just the way they are. Even if she's a whore. Even if he's a jerk. Even if she humiliates you in public. Even if he cuts all your credit cards.
People change often. Into a better person. Into a worse person. Who knows what the future holds. To love someone unconditionally, you have to love them no matter what they do. Even if you disagree with it. To love someone unconditionally means to love someone no matter how they look like. Ugly, pretty, cute, handsome. Love isn't about needs. You don't need that person to be rich and gorgeous and down to earth to love him/her. If you love somebody that's arrogant and ugly and snobby, without getting sick of what he/she does, then you are loving him/her unconditionally.
Love in not about fear. It's not about jealousy. It's not about possessiveness. Love is not about lust. It's not expecting him/her to be like you want him/her to be. No matter how ugly that person really is, inside and outside, and you don't mind what she/he does, then, that is love. That is what love really means. That is how you love somebody.
Truth is, nobody can tell you what love really is. So, to love somebody, you have to forget everything you learned about it. Because love is spontaneous. It happens just like that. Like magic. You never know when you're gonna love somebody. Sometimes, in a blink of an eye, you see an angel right in front of you and you feel that tingle in your heart and butterflies in your stomach and your whole world just lit up and you feel like you are the only two people left in the world. Sometimes, you don't know what you're getting yourself into. 'Cause when you're in love, you do crazy things. You scream at things he does even if it's just a small thing. You melt when he compliments you. You feel like you're, I don't know. The only girl in the world I guess.
Ever seen the movie, My Sassy Girl? Well, that movie explains a lot about love. He's mature. She's immature. He's responsible. She's out of control. He's focused. She's fun. He's sophisticated. She's wild. See how different they are from each other? Surely the guy would want a girl just like him. But no. He loves the girl who drives him nuts. Who made him do illegal things. Who brings up a whole other side of him. And he has never asked her to change. That is what love is. You just go with it. No matter how embarrassed you'll be if you do that. No matter how immature that is. That's love.
As a boyfriend, your job is to know how to comfort your girlfriend. You should know how to not make your girlfriend sad or mad. That goes the same to the girlfriend. You should know how to entertain her. How to make her happy. You should remember everything she tells you about her. The little things. Those are the things that counts most. Treat her like she's the best thing that's ever happened to you. 'Cause that's what girls want. Yeah, maybe girls are so needy and all those stuff. But it's just like that. As a boyfriend, you should never ask, "how do I make you happy?" because she'll only get madder or sadder that she was before because the only person who she expects to comfort her is her boyfriend and to know that he doesn't know how to do just makes it worse. So yeah, if you really love her, you'd know exactly how to treat her at her best and at her worst.
As a girlfriend, you have to respect your boyfriend. Respect his decisions. If he doesn't like what you do, you could either change or tell him why you act that way. I understand that you're your own person, but he has a saying in this. This goes the same to the boyfriend as well. As a girlfriend, you should not make your boyfriend mad. Never go over the limit. Especially with sensitive and hot-headed boys. You will not want to know what will happen if you go over the limit. You should also not get jealousy ahead of you. As I stated above, jealousy is not love. And one more thing about jealousy, is that it started off little. Then, it grows bigger and bigger. And before you know it, you won't let him talk to any girl at all (same with boys).
So, conclusion, as a couple, you guys should not be jealous of whoever talks to another girl or boy. You should respect each other. Make some rules to avoid fights. Don't cheat on each other or doubt each other. But then again, who am I to tell you how to live your life, right? I mean, if you do this kind of thing with each other that makes you happy, then continue on doing it. Be different!
Every child deserves a parent's love. A friend of mine told me that her father would sign a contract or whatever it is to say that she's not her daughter anymore if she converts from whatever religion she is to a Muslim. What kind of parent does that? She's still your child. Shouldn't you love her in any way she is? Parents should help their children in any matter. Big or small.
Love. What can you say about it? It's amazing.
Love is unconditional. To love someone, you must love them unconditionally. Or it's not love. Loving somebody unconditionally means that you love them just the way they are. Even if she's a whore. Even if he's a jerk. Even if she humiliates you in public. Even if he cuts all your credit cards.
People change often. Into a better person. Into a worse person. Who knows what the future holds. To love someone unconditionally, you have to love them no matter what they do. Even if you disagree with it. To love someone unconditionally means to love someone no matter how they look like. Ugly, pretty, cute, handsome. Love isn't about needs. You don't need that person to be rich and gorgeous and down to earth to love him/her. If you love somebody that's arrogant and ugly and snobby, without getting sick of what he/she does, then you are loving him/her unconditionally.
Love in not about fear. It's not about jealousy. It's not about possessiveness. Love is not about lust. It's not expecting him/her to be like you want him/her to be. No matter how ugly that person really is, inside and outside, and you don't mind what she/he does, then, that is love. That is what love really means. That is how you love somebody.
Truth is, nobody can tell you what love really is. So, to love somebody, you have to forget everything you learned about it. Because love is spontaneous. It happens just like that. Like magic. You never know when you're gonna love somebody. Sometimes, in a blink of an eye, you see an angel right in front of you and you feel that tingle in your heart and butterflies in your stomach and your whole world just lit up and you feel like you are the only two people left in the world. Sometimes, you don't know what you're getting yourself into. 'Cause when you're in love, you do crazy things. You scream at things he does even if it's just a small thing. You melt when he compliments you. You feel like you're, I don't know. The only girl in the world I guess.
Ever seen the movie, My Sassy Girl? Well, that movie explains a lot about love. He's mature. She's immature. He's responsible. She's out of control. He's focused. She's fun. He's sophisticated. She's wild. See how different they are from each other? Surely the guy would want a girl just like him. But no. He loves the girl who drives him nuts. Who made him do illegal things. Who brings up a whole other side of him. And he has never asked her to change. That is what love is. You just go with it. No matter how embarrassed you'll be if you do that. No matter how immature that is. That's love.
As a boyfriend, your job is to know how to comfort your girlfriend. You should know how to not make your girlfriend sad or mad. That goes the same to the girlfriend. You should know how to entertain her. How to make her happy. You should remember everything she tells you about her. The little things. Those are the things that counts most. Treat her like she's the best thing that's ever happened to you. 'Cause that's what girls want. Yeah, maybe girls are so needy and all those stuff. But it's just like that. As a boyfriend, you should never ask, "how do I make you happy?" because she'll only get madder or sadder that she was before because the only person who she expects to comfort her is her boyfriend and to know that he doesn't know how to do just makes it worse. So yeah, if you really love her, you'd know exactly how to treat her at her best and at her worst.
As a girlfriend, you have to respect your boyfriend. Respect his decisions. If he doesn't like what you do, you could either change or tell him why you act that way. I understand that you're your own person, but he has a saying in this. This goes the same to the boyfriend as well. As a girlfriend, you should not make your boyfriend mad. Never go over the limit. Especially with sensitive and hot-headed boys. You will not want to know what will happen if you go over the limit. You should also not get jealousy ahead of you. As I stated above, jealousy is not love. And one more thing about jealousy, is that it started off little. Then, it grows bigger and bigger. And before you know it, you won't let him talk to any girl at all (same with boys).
So, conclusion, as a couple, you guys should not be jealous of whoever talks to another girl or boy. You should respect each other. Make some rules to avoid fights. Don't cheat on each other or doubt each other. But then again, who am I to tell you how to live your life, right? I mean, if you do this kind of thing with each other that makes you happy, then continue on doing it. Be different!
Every child deserves a parent's love. A friend of mine told me that her father would sign a contract or whatever it is to say that she's not her daughter anymore if she converts from whatever religion she is to a Muslim. What kind of parent does that? She's still your child. Shouldn't you love her in any way she is? Parents should help their children in any matter. Big or small.
Love. What can you say about it? It's amazing.
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Paranoia?
WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH PARANOIA?! WHY MUST THE FEELING EXIST?! It sucks! I feel like my head's gonna explode just being paranoid! I can't help to always think about it and my legs are shaking and I'm having trouble breathing. And before I know it, I've completely gone crazy! I was breathing so loudly like a retard. I leg was shaking like it's on a vibrating machine. The thought of you not replying keeps spinning in my head....
Should I start from the first?
Okay, so here goes..
When my mom got back from work today, she said in a hyper tone that she wants to create a Facebook account. And then, she saw my computer with the screen savers on the screen. They were picture from the last Raya. AAH! THERE WAS A PICTURE OF ME SITTING BESIDE HAZIQ! I was "Ohmygod-ing" in my head! She can't find out about us! Anyway, she keeps making me create her an account. I didn't want to, so I tried to avoid her.
Then, after dinner, I logged on Facebook and changed my relationship status just in case my mom stalks me. I posted on Haziq's wall, saying that I'll explain later. Then I felt guilty and text messaged him instead. MY LEG COULDN'T STOP SHAKING! I couldn't breathe. I ended up spamming Adilah's wall with crazy wall posts. I chatted with Imran like crazy. I couldn't stop typing so fast! And all I was scared about was Haziq getting so mad that he doesn't wanna reply my text -.-''.
Paranoia
Don't let it get to you!
IT'S EVIL !
Should I start from the first?
Okay, so here goes..
When my mom got back from work today, she said in a hyper tone that she wants to create a Facebook account. And then, she saw my computer with the screen savers on the screen. They were picture from the last Raya. AAH! THERE WAS A PICTURE OF ME SITTING BESIDE HAZIQ! I was "Ohmygod-ing" in my head! She can't find out about us! Anyway, she keeps making me create her an account. I didn't want to, so I tried to avoid her.
Then, after dinner, I logged on Facebook and changed my relationship status just in case my mom stalks me. I posted on Haziq's wall, saying that I'll explain later. Then I felt guilty and text messaged him instead. MY LEG COULDN'T STOP SHAKING! I couldn't breathe. I ended up spamming Adilah's wall with crazy wall posts. I chatted with Imran like crazy. I couldn't stop typing so fast! And all I was scared about was Haziq getting so mad that he doesn't wanna reply my text -.-''.
Paranoia
Don't let it get to you!
IT'S EVIL !
Monday, November 1, 2010
Kampung People
The other day, Hidayah told me that Razleena called the upstairs' kids "Budak Kampung". What does that actually mean? It's not like we live in a village or something. Dude, you can obviously see that we live in a city.
Sure, we might not all get along, but who are you to call us "Budak Kampung" ? Okay, I admit, we call the downstairs' girls "gedik" and all that, but who says we're not? Look, we may judge people, but we don't forget to judge ourselves first. Well, maybe just me. I don't know bout the others. Maybe you should do the same. Before you said we were village kids, have you looked in the mirror and judged yourself yet?
This city full with people with weird inside jokes. Just because you don't get what a couple of boys were laughing about, doesn't mean we upstairs' kids are village kids! Like you don't have any inside jokes. Like you've never laughed loudly when a person enters a class because of what embarrassing thing he/she did yesterday.
Just remember to judge yourself first before judging others. There will be some people who gets really offended, like me -.-''.
Sure, we might not all get along, but who are you to call us "Budak Kampung" ? Okay, I admit, we call the downstairs' girls "gedik" and all that, but who says we're not? Look, we may judge people, but we don't forget to judge ourselves first. Well, maybe just me. I don't know bout the others. Maybe you should do the same. Before you said we were village kids, have you looked in the mirror and judged yourself yet?
This city full with people with weird inside jokes. Just because you don't get what a couple of boys were laughing about, doesn't mean we upstairs' kids are village kids! Like you don't have any inside jokes. Like you've never laughed loudly when a person enters a class because of what embarrassing thing he/she did yesterday.
Just remember to judge yourself first before judging others. There will be some people who gets really offended, like me -.-''.